By Daniel Butler
This hysterical choice of tales of tangible crimes dedicated by means of clumsy crooks and fumbling felons may have you giggling out loud at painfully dumb makes an attempt at crime. Illustrated.
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At the morning of February 4th 1733, the our bodies of 3 girls have been stumbled on at quantity three Tanfield courtroom a number of yards from the Temple Church on the motels of courtroom. day after today, a tender laundress, Sarah Malcolm, was once arrested and charged with their homicide. The grotesque nature of the crime allied to her early life and sweetness stunned London society.
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Writer notice: Alan Keightley (Foreword), Colin Wilson (Introduction), Peter Sotos (Afterword)
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Extra info for America's Dumbest Criminals
The coyote followed. It would rush one way, zig and zag, then chase after the other guy. Finally, the coyote ran for the nearest cover, which was a five-by-eleven-foot shaded area—right under the new Blazer. The situation had quickly turned from bad to worse. The terrible two were now the ones scared, confused, and panicked. And they, like their little victim, were helpless. They couldn’t chase him off. They couldn’t drag him out. They couldn’t even get near him. In fact, they had to run even faster now .
Piece of cake. That sounded pretty good to Junior. He hadn’t had lunch, and by now he had worked up quite an appetite rifling through the house. He decided to see what the kitchen had to offer. Well, all right! The lady of the house hadn’t bothered to clean out the fridge before she left. Junior found some nice chicken salad and a loaf of bread, a few carrot sticks, some potato chips, and some chocolate milk. Hey, may as well put it on a tray, kick back, and catch a little TV. So that’s just what Junior did.
S. history, and it carries a lesson for all would-be dumb criminals: If you’re going to mess with Uncle Sam, make sure you don’t wake up the neighbors! DUMB CRIMINAL QUIZ NO. 007 How well do you know the dumb criminal mind? An officer fired at a bearded burglary suspect. The fleeing felon was unhurt, but the bullet tore a hole in the man’s shirt as it flapped in the breeze. The criminal escaped. Immediately afterward, did he . . (a) sew his shirt while he watched television? (b) shave his beard and go right down to the police station?
America's Dumbest Criminals by Daniel Butler